So y'all know that as part of my treatment earlier this year, I started a healthy, balanced diet. I eat all my fruits and veggies and whole grains and all the appropriate fats and yada yada yada. I get a lot of really good fiber. You know what the worst part about that is?
Pooping takes no time at all. Seriously, I'm in and out of the bathroom in like 3 minutes, and that includes counting to 20 while I thoroughly wash my hands.
I *like* a little time on the toilet. Finish a few chapters of a book, read a story in Reader's Digest (heh, digest), contemplate the meaning of life, etc. Now I hardly have enough time to read one of the funnies on the Life In These United States page.
It's also why I'm not blogging more. Believe it or not, quite a bit of my blog inspiration has come while I was pooping. Conversely, I Twitter a lot more, since my streamlined pooping process allows for only 140 characters' worth of inspiration.
So, if you want me to blog more, send me cheese. I'm allowed roughly 5 ounces of cheese per day, more if I count my cheese as fat, and I would like to blog more. Thank you.
3 months ago
11 comments:
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LMAO!!
I eat a lot of fiber, too. My dh is amazed at how fast of a pooper I am.
I LOVE that you have shared this on your blog.
Finally someone I can relate with!
Cousin.
Cousin.
... Cousin.
You are pushing too hard. If you aren't pushing hard, but instead it's "just falling out", then it's because your sphincter is weak. I suggest by-the-half-hour exercises for two weeks, and then daily thereafter for maintenance. To make it easy, think about the guys you pursued in your adolescent years while you exercise.
On a sidenote, "branon" is the word verification necessary for me to post. I thought that was neat.
BWHAHAHAHA!!
You're a hoot!
so, you want cheese? guess that's what your getting for christmas then...cause i'm ready for some blogs. :)
pepperjack, cheddar, american???? what beez yo pleasure???
Well.....
Um......
Thanks for the insight!
I'll start checking into cheese of the month clubs.
personally, at work we gots an airline sized wassercloset, and I love that it's under 3 minutes. I'll send some cheese yo way...
Oh my!! you have left me speechless!!!! IBS is no fun either other than I would have time to blog. LOL!!!
hahahahaaaaaaaaaaaa!!!!
I always wondered why reading material was needed in the bathroom. lol!
ya know, chase has noticed i've been spending a lot less time in the bathroom too! i too have changed my way of living/eating/etc. i haven't played the bathroom DS (brainage) in about a month now. lol we all have our weird habits, yes.
uh, eat some cheese. i need a blog to read, m-kay?
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