I'm totally nosy in the grocery store. I will stand behind you and examine your purchases and make judgments about you based on them. I'm a really, really weird person like that. If I see that you have 8 microwave pizzas and a 6-pack of beer in your cart, I'm going to assume you're single or in college. If you have frozen fries, a pint of ice cream, and a sappy movie you picked up off the $5 rack, I'm going to assume it's your time of month. If you have strawberries and whipped cream, I'm going to assume the best.
I was thrown for a loop today. I got behind a man who had a box of fruit-and-cream oatmeal, a pint of potato salad, and a lime. One lime.
Of course I told Drew about this, and he suggested it was a new kind of diet. "Yes," I said, "the 'buy 3 random non-complementary items from the grocery store, mix them together, and see how much you can stomach' diet."
Following through with my compulsory judgment, I figured he had forgotten those items on his normal grocery store trip. It was better than the diet idea.
5 months ago
9 comments:
Oatmeal for his kid. Lime for the corona he already has in the fridge. And potato salad for soaking up the corona after he gets through.
That's a single dad on a budget. hahaha!
Or, the oatmeal could be his breakfast for the morning after. LMAO!
You are as bad as me! I will look at someones buggy & you can so tell by the items they have if they are single/married/etc... I laugh about it at times.
Breakfast, lunch and a limeade?
God I hope you never show up behind me in the grocery store.
He got sent to the store for the potato salad and lime and then he added the oatmeal to the list....?
No no no..... the lime was for marguaritas they were making at the cookout that somebody forgot to make potato salad for.
The oatmeal was because he is a man and his wife told him to get oatmeal so she could whip up some no bake cookies and he thought fruit and cream cookies sounded good.
sounds like some kind of geriatric smoothie...
No, wait! Jen is partly right, so is Stacey! Here's what up:
Guy 1: Dude, you bought $200 worth of meat for the killer cue, but what sides do you have?
Guy 2: Dude, Starches and Veggies are what meat eat.
Guy 1: DUDE! You gotta have some potato salad or something! And dude, there no lime for the Corona! How can we watch the State game without limes?
Guy 2: (..Grumble) Dude, you're like...needy.
Guy 1: Alright Alright dude! I'll go back to the store. Anything else we need?
Guy 2: Dude, it would be friggin' awesome if we put oatmeal in the apartment swimming pool.
Guy 1: Dude! Shh-Yaah! I'm out!
I'm with you on the forgotten items list. Hubs and I went to Wally World last night and this afternoon he's going to Winn Dixie to pick up all the things Wally was sold out of. He'll be buying ground beef, pickled pork, and parmesean cheese. That should make for an interesting basket.
I thought about you when I was at WalMart, checking all around me because this is what my buggy had: TMI to follow fellas:
25pounds of dogfood, cat food, cat litter, vagisil (heh-damn antibiotics), 20 pk of Bud Light, 6Dr Pepper 2 Liters, and toilet paper. HAHAHA!!!!
I was buggy racing through there! hehe
Wait; you mean you haven't tried oatmeal-lime potato salad yet?
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