I'm totally nosy in the grocery store. I will stand behind you and examine your purchases and make judgments about you based on them. I'm a really, really weird person like that. If I see that you have 8 microwave pizzas and a 6-pack of beer in your cart, I'm going to assume you're single or in college. If you have frozen fries, a pint of ice cream, and a sappy movie you picked up off the $5 rack, I'm going to assume it's your time of month. If you have strawberries and whipped cream, I'm going to assume the best.
I was thrown for a loop today. I got behind a man who had a box of fruit-and-cream oatmeal, a pint of potato salad, and a lime. One lime.
Of course I told Drew about this, and he suggested it was a new kind of diet. "Yes," I said, "the 'buy 3 random non-complementary items from the grocery store, mix them together, and see how much you can stomach' diet."
Following through with my compulsory judgment, I figured he had forgotten those items on his normal grocery store trip. It was better than the diet idea.
1 month ago