Belk's women's section should be called "Today's Old Woman" instead of "Today's Woman." I've never seen a more horrifying array of ugly clothes in my life. I know for a fact that they have awesome clothes for the thinner ladies, as I've been shopping there countless times with my mom and sister. But holy moly. If you're brave, the next time you're in there, check out the women's section.
Lane Bryant should rename itself "Clothes for Rich Fatties" or "We Know You, The Fashion-Conscious Fatty, Have Very Little Choice As To Where You Shop, So We're Going To Charge You $40 For A Shirt, Which Basically Makes You Our You-Know-What." Good thing I had a coupon.
Kohls' women's section should be renamed "Buy These, the Most Uninteresting Clothes One Could Ever Lay One's Eyes On." (I love Kohls' professional outfits, and they have pretty great stuff for normal-sized women, but for casual wear... snooooze.)
So the shirt I bought at Lane Bry... I mean Clothes for Rich Fatties is TOTALLY PERFECT. I mean, I couldn't have asked for a better shirt, and I'm so pleased. Even though I'm Lane Bryant's you-know-what. Now I have to decide what shoes to wear. Wish me luck.
1 month ago