Tuesday, March 24, 2009

When you read this, I'll be asleep.

To those of you who have children and those of you who will have children one day:

I solemnly swear that under no circumstances will I ever feel hurt or neglected or underappreciated when you get rid of any gift I gave to your child. Unless you burn it in effigy. That'll be a little insulting. If you feel that my gift was too special and you don't want to give it away or don't want to keep it in your house any more, you're more than welcome to give that toy back to me.

Are we agreed?

Based on that agreement, I would like to add that you are, under no circumstances, ever allowed to be insulted that I have chosen to donate any gift that was given to my child. I will take special considerations for the gifts that were given with a heart that says "I researched this toy and spent hours online buying that toy, and I sincerely want him to have it." If you're any of my grandparents, there's a strong likelihood that I will keep your toy. But yeah, everything you grabbed at Wal Mart the day of the party? Gone. I ain't hatin' on you for doing it. You buy these things with my son solidly in mind, and he gets great joy out of it for maybe a day or two, then instead of being the toy that brings him hours of joy, it's just one more thing he wants to hide in the toilet or under his mattress.

This ramble is brought to you by the fact that I just spent an hour and a half cleaning out Ace's bedroom, sending Drew to the garage roughly 10 times with bags full of toys and clothes. I can say though, that other than one minor thing that needs to be done, his room is spring cleaned. YEAH.

It feels nice to be useful to my family though. Earlier, I just felt like vacuuming. I haven't felt that way in months. Till recently, I'd see Ace covered in dust-bunnies and realize I hadn't vacuumed in a week and I probably oughta get to that. Or, also, DEAR GOD THERE WILL BE PEOPLE IN MY HOUSE IN HALF AN HOUR HIDE THE KITTY DINGLEBERRIES AND FEBREZE BOMB THE LIVING ROOM. That was always stressful.. In any event, I don't know if it's because the depression is lifting or the fact that I'm HIIIGGGGHHH right now, but it's making me feel good to feel like cleaning.

Speaking of being completely loaded, I took another Ambien about 20 minutes ago and I swear, the words on the screen keep arguing with each other. I know it soundds' weird but that's how I've felt... like they're people at a bar on the verge of getting kicked out of the bar. Also, I can't turn my head without the world turning with it. Also, I just looked at the time on the upper right corner of my screen and it felt like it kept getting farther and farther away the more I looked toward it. This paragraph brought to you by Ambien. Ambien, the hallucinating while you blog sleeping pill.

Let's hope this works, y'all. I need many, many hours of sleep, so lets hope the ambien does it for me. I'm gonna go brush the bathroom and go on my teeth. o r something.

9 comments:

Crawdaddy79 said...

Hey, looks like I'm first!

(Only to inevitably be beaten by someone else as I type this)

Interesting post, cuz. Right now I'm sick with something (I don't know what) but in addition to my sore throat, my saliva glands are going crazy... I can spit out about two teaspoons worth of ... spit every twenty seconds. I've been keeping paper towels in my mouth to soak everything up. Hopefully this goes away quick. Right now I'm in the process of dehydrating myself so that I can sleep without drowning.

What?! said...

hope you slept well....you can spring clean my house when you get done....

Shelby said...

I hear ya on the cleaning out of the kids' rooms. My NINETEEN year old has toys from when he was eight or nine that he WILL NOT part with. One day, I'm gonna get brave and go in there and take matters into my own hands...

In the meantime, if Ambien makes a chick feel like cleaning, I need to get my doc to hook me up with some of that!

mayberry said...

There's a reason they tell you to take the Ambien and immediately get in the bed.

From the Doghouse said...

I'm with you on the toys. I've gotten to the point that, if I step on it and it hurt, it's gone.

Hope your test goes well today.

dhcoop said...

Hope you get some much need rest hun!

K Storm said...

Yeah, you can't worry about the toys that much...they are only things...keep the extra special ones but once they've stopped playing with them or moved on..pass them on somewhere else. I ship ours to the church/daycare to replace the broken ones they have to toss.

kitty dingleberries made me laugh!

Hope you are feeling better.

i'm black betty said...

did you get some sleep?

Jen said...

GIrl, that Ambien is the devil! My old boss and his wife both took it and one morning he came in and asked me to check something on his credit card because it declined that morning at the gas pump. I looked and those two morons had ordered $2000 on his cc at 2 a.m. from Victoria's secret and his cc company thought it was fraud! Neither one of them even remembered doing that shit. So, be careful. Keep the cc's all locked up. LOL!

Hope you are doing well with the other new druggies