Thursday, July 03, 2008

wish me luck

So today, I'm going to get what's called a hysterosalpingogram, or HSG. I'm hellafied nervous about it.

This is where you should stop reading.

I had one of these done in 2005, shortly after my ectopic pregnancy, so I kinda know what to expect. I'll get assaulted by a speculum and some dye will get shot into my uterus, then the dye will hopefully go easily through my fallopian tubes and then spill unchecked into my abdominal cavity. The magical x-ray machine will then take a picture of my reproductive organs. I will stand up and try to look reasonably dignified in my hospital gown while holding a towel between my legs to catch any remaining dye while listening to instructions from the radiologist's staff. I will then be free to get dressed and leave the hospital.

On my way home from the radiologist's office, my uterus, rebelling against the intrusion, will clench angrily for roughly an hour. Upon arriving home, I will lay on the couch and whine about my pain, watching The Real World and begging Drew to go get me one of those new Thin Mint Blizzards from Dairy Queen. (Duuuuude.) Should he protest, I will look at him and remind him that these are the things I'm putting my body through in order to prepare it for his child and he should shut up and ask if I want a medium or a large Blizzard and tell me I look pretty and that he loves me more than he did the day we were married.

Hopefully, my OB/GYN's nurse will call me next week and tell me whether or not my fallopian tubes are cleared for takeoff.

If yes, I buy a ticket on the crazy train and start trying for another baby.

If no, I get another surgery to clear endometrial tissue from my tubes and unblock them.

Either way, party.

13 comments:

sinister_n_evil said...

I had one of those back in 1999 or 2000 before I had CJ... It was not pleasant at all and I recall my doctor forcing the die to clear one of my tubes... but I remember him telling me right after the proceedure if my tubes were clear... and you can see the monitor too.. at least my doc let me watch the monitor...

best of luck to you...

clstigger said...

Will be praying for you to get good news.

Emma B. said...

Let me know how it went -- I know they're not fun.

(Dude, thin mint blizzards? Why has no one told me of this before?!?!!)

Jennifer said...

Ah, yes, we are on the same page for this one again...and on the same schedule apparently...I am starting the meds at peak+3 and if all goes "well" (grrr....) I will be pregnant in July...Ahhh the terror! But I am so sick of waiting and wondering and worrying and thinking about it. Do I really want to be doing this in my thirties? It probably won't get any easier. Keep me updated! (Prayers!)

HEATHER said...

Good Luck, ladybug!
I will be praying for you!

Sharon said...

Good Luck, brave woman!

Drew BETTER step up to the game. Shoot. You should have one of those blizzards for DINNER and then again dessert, if you like. :)

Oh yea, and I would skip the whole looking dignified part. They make enough money to skip it. ;)

Miss Mud Puddle said...

I will be praying for ya!

Deanna said...

The things we do... for love!

I will definitely be thinking about you and praying.

mayberry said...

Why don't you just stop off for a colonoscopy on your way back - ya know - make a day of it?

rachel said...

i am thinking about ya. seth and i are going to start trying for baby #2 after the marathon!

Lauren said...

Wow, you remain awake through that cramping? I had to get a vaguely similar procedure done once. Like you, the cramping set in afterwards. I drove home, promptly took a handful of ibuprofen, and surrendered to unconsciousness, all while swearing that I would never have children because if labor was any worse than the cramps, I didn't need to know about it.

Watercolor said...

Praying for ya babe.

Sandi said...

We missed on you Friday ... but sister, we totally understand. Sorry it was so godawful.
*hugs*

And good luck.