I think my kid's a racist. I seriously think so. Today, as we were strolling through Babies R Us, like 5 white people correctly noted that Ace is adorable, big, happy, smart, (??) and cute. He smiled at every one of them except for one, when he was too enthralled with his keys to notice. Then, we get to the checkout counter, which was being manned (womanned) by a black woman. As she was scanning my things, she looked at Ace and smiled at him and said "Hey, big boy!" He looked at her in terror and started wailing like she had just pinched him.
I've done a pretty good job in socializing him over the past few months. In January, he would have started wailing had anyone looked at him. He did this pouty-faced thing, then breaks out in a heart-wrenching wail. Now, he at least smiles. Now that I think about it, though, he never smiles at anyone that's not white. During his physical therapy evaluation, there were 2 white women (the therapists) and 3 black women (a coordinator, a speech therapist, and a physical therapist in training) at my house. The speech therapist was sitting closest to him, and every time she'd look at him, he'd look panicked for a second then look at me. But there's a girl he's never seen before throwing him all over the place in the name of evaluation, and he's having a good old time.
I have fears of raising a child in white-dominated Mississippi private schools, but Drew won't have it any other way. I told myself that if I ever had any inkling that he had racist tendencies, the next time we walked out the door it'd be on the way to The King Center in Atlanta. I sure didn't think I'd have to be making that trip for another few years.
3 months ago
5 comments:
I think it is all about exposure. Look at me, I grew up in Mississippi and I married non-white. I'm not saying I'm not a racist (I hate it when people are like, "I'm not racist, I have black friends") but I hope I am not, however that is for other people to decide.
I think Ace just needs to hang out with black people. I don't believe what they say about children that small being racist because they inherit it from their parents even subconsciously- I would believe it if Ace was four or five and flipping out, but he is just a baby. I think he is just not used to seeing dark skin (y'all are pasty, no offense). He just needs to see more.
ROFL! Don't stress yourself out about it. It's probably a matter of what he's used to seeing around him all the time. When the girls were little they were terrified of my sister's husband, who is Iranian. Though it might have also been the mustache. They didn't like facial hair very much, either.
BTW, I am keeping you and your intention in my prayers. Aside from that, I had nothing to offer, but I'm sure the Big Guy will do what He can to help. ;)
hey i think he will be fine. We grew up in a relatively all white school and i think we turned out okay. I dont have a large group of friends that are a different ethnic group than me but i try to socialize at the library, park, etc. with everyone. I hope that through that and proper learning tools my child will be raised with a love for all people. I use books that show a wide range of people to show her that everyone is different. I havent had many problems with race yet Except occassionally she stares longer than she should but i have had lots of problems with her pointing out peoples flaws!!!Big butts or teeth missing...i think it all falls in the same category...you have to teach them that when they see differences to point out that everyone is different in many ways not just skin tones...Hopefully as they grow we can teach them all the things they should know!
I'm sorry, but this cracks me up! lol. I'm sure he will change. And I bet it was no picnic for you, but it's hilarious!
Maybe you can make him watch Sesame St. They integrate every race and condition of people possible! ;)
p.s.-I'll let you know if our excessive beans this week makes us as musical as you predict. :)
Erin's right. It's not who you are exposed to (I grew up going to predominantly white schools), but what you are taught. Race is just an afterthought to me, and (obviously) my sister is the same way. It's just not a big deal.
My girls have more exposure, but not by much. It's just the circles we run in. I teach them that God makes every person. If I'm able to catechize them properly, it doesn't matter if they never become personal friends with black people, red people, or polka-dotted people. When they do meet anyone different, they'll treat them with the respect every person is due just because they are a child of God.
If I do my job well. ;)
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