Sorry, Grandma

I got an e-mail from my Grandma the other day regarding Mr. Buttface. She reads my blog.

Hi Stacey

If i was there I would give you a paddling, chaseing that car down?? Its a good thing you didn't catch it or they knew you were after them... Take care sweetie, say hi to drew and kiss ace for m. and QUIT chasing crazy people!! haha love you! Grandma

Dear Grandma,
I'm sorry to have worried you. It's not my fault, you see, as one time when I was much younger and very impressionable, I saw your daughter, my stepmother, flip the bird at a guy who had cut her off. My confrontational driving skills have gotten much worse since then. I've flipped a few birds at people, just like Vicki. Once, I even followed a guy into a Walmart parking lot and had a talk with him because he cut me off really closely.

So as you see, I'm just trying to emulate Vicki. I just want to make her proud.

Your loving and indisputably favorite granddaughter,
Stacey

P.S. I had also never uttered a swear word, looked at a boy's butt, or seen an R-rated movie before I met Vicki.

P.P.S. Mr. Buttface loses. Our insurance company is giving us a nice chunk of change for our damage, and since Drew's going to do the repairs, we don't have to pay a repair shop to do it. I'd still like to see Mr. Buttface be punished, but I suppose in the end he will be. But hey, we're netting a few hundred dollars from the whole thing, so it could have been a lot worse.