90-10

90% of the time, being a stay-at-home mom is an absolute joy. 90% of the time, I know deep down that this is the best thing I can be doing for my child, my husband, and myself. 90% of the time, I love the fact that I'll witness all of my son's firsts and get to kiss him whenever I want.

10% of the time, I find myself remembering the dozen or so full-time offers from companies for whom I temped. 10% of the time, I want to dig up my resume and look up daycare centers. 100% of the time, I hate myself and feel like crap for feeling this way 10% of the time. How much and how long did I want this kid, only to feel like dumping him off on someone else to take care of.

I've turned off comments for this post and the last because I don't want to hear from everyone that thinks I need "a vacation." 12 hours away from my kid is not a vacation. I don't want to go to New Orleans to escape my kid, people. I want to go so I can see my best friend graduate.