Okay, so my husband is very perplexed about the fact that so many people remember him with a wallet chain. He insists that he never had one, and has offered several explanations as to why people might think such a terrible thing. His oldest friend even corroborated the story.
Well, I cannot live in secret anymore. I cannot go on mocking my husband (although his horrendous exasperation at the idea of having a wallet chain is hilarious) for, you see, I'd be a big ol' hypocrite.
That's right, ladies and gentlemen, I had a wallet chain. LET ME EXPLAIN!!!
Highschool started the tomboy phase for me. I had never been much of a girly girl, but I went full-on tomboy in about 9th grade. See, I thought that following along with the baggy things trend would get me into the popular crowd. I also became a brand name wearer, Nike, Adidas, Abercrombie and Fitch, I simply had to have it. I'd spend $24 on a t-shirt just to have that A&F adorning my body somewhere. I even stuffed myself into boys' Gap jeans because the girls' jeans didn't fit me and I wanted desperately to have Gap jeans. I made $4.25 an hour, folks, and my dad stopped buying me clothes when I was 11.
Somewhere in there, I went from tomboy to man. Baggy jeans, baggy shirts, anything to cover up the fact that I was fat. Wallet chains were kinda popular among the "freak" crowd (I believe they're called "alternative" now) and I thought I'd fit in by getting one. Only, I left for France before coming up with this fantastic idea. So, while in France, I bought a wallet, complete with chain, and wore it during my entire 4 month stay.
Now, I'm utterly ashamed. Having openly mocked my husband for a chain he never wore, having proudly owned my own. Such a hypocrite, and at the expense of a man whom I love more than anything else in the world.
Even if he did have a wallet chain.
2 weeks ago