Ace talks from the moment he wakes up till the moment he falls asleep. For the next 3 minutes, as much as I'm able to keep up, I'm going to type everything he says.
"Is the radio going on? Where's the radio? Is the radio on? Is it? That's a plane outside, I hear it. I hear one, mama, I do. I hear it! Is the umbrella open, mom? Is it? Give it to Miss Heather. Stop doing that! Will you please close this umbrella mama? Will you please close it? Are you closin it mama? Are you sittin' on the couch mama? Are you? ARE YOU? Did you close it? I got this umbrella. I do. I do. Do I supposed to hit, mama? Do I? DO I? Will you please close the umbrella mama? Can I open it? I'm gonna spin it. Did you hurt yourself, mama? Did you? What do I hear? I'm gonna open the umbrella. Will you please close the umbrella? Are you hiding in the umbrella mama? My penis is in my lap. That's my penis. Dib dib dib dib dib. Can you close the umbrella mama? Hey mama what are you doing? This is my baton, mama. I'm gonna conduct. What is this? This is an umbrella. Do I supposed to spit?"
I swear I respond to every question. But dang if he doesn't ask it a million times. And yes, I closed the umbrella. I have closed the umbrella 97 times this morning.
I never thought I'd be the kind of person that cherished quiet time, but Lord have mercy.
1 month ago