Wednesday, August 20, 2008

Ah well.

Day 3 will happen tomorrow. Ace had a 101 degree fever yesterday after he woke up from his nap, and school rules state that he can't go to school for 24 hours after hitting 100. He cooled down almost immediately and hasn't had a fever since, but I guess he's battling this sinus crud even harder than I am. It sucks. Freakin' weird weather.

I think I'm feeling like some of y'all thought that Ace's anxiety around other kids was all in my head and a few days of school would be the end of that. This is not at all the case. Remember how we saw a developmental psychiatrist over the whole thing? This has been going on for nearly a year. It's not something you can understand unless you've seen him crumple and start hitting himself because my neighbor's 4-year-old daughter walked up and said hi to him. This is not at all normal - his doctor, therapists, and subsequently, his psychiatrist agreed.

I'm sure he enjoys the school because there are at least 4 people at the ready to lavish attention on him whenever possible. When in a roomful of adults, Ace is golden. Most of you have met him, and he's charmed your pants off, right? This is not the case when he's around other children. When another child makes any kind of noise or attempts to interact with Ace in any way, he gets scared and completely breaks down. At school, he's got at least 4 people (2 teachers and 2 volunteers) that will immediately pick him up and comfort him, and he's sat on someone's lap for most of both of the days he's been at school.

It's also a high-energy day, filled with singing and eating and playing. There's always something fun to do, and rarely is someone there telling him he can't do something. This isn't the case at home, so I'm sure he's really enjoyed his two days at school, and that's why he ran into the other classroom and shut the door in my face.

This is not to say that I don't think that being at school and just good ol' time won't help his anxiety. The developmental psychiatrist said he'd need structured, guided play with other kids and that's what he's getting. This is also not to say that possibly those two days haven't already helped his anxiety. I'm just saying that it's not *abracadabra* gone.

There. Had to get that off my chest. Sorry if there was mucus on it.

10 comments:

Jo said...

Hugs!

We've already talked :)

I'm still here with ya!!

HEATHER said...

Bless his heart.
I was an only child, but I really didn't like other children because they were too loud. Seriously.
My reactions weren't like his, but it was still hard on me to be around other kids.
((HUGS)) to you and him.

Watercolor said...

Understand. I, personally, never thought it would be magic and figure there will be some very rough patches ahead. Just also figured it was a good start that he was enjoying being there at all. A great start doesn't mean everything is all hunky dory. But I pray that he is in a wonderful environment where his teachers can help him tiny little bits by little bits find a way through this anxiety. I guess that is part of what is at the root of my excitement for him. That he is in a place where he has this chance to learn. Does that make any sense.... lol.... it is a bad head day so it may not.... In any event, hugs and know that you and sweet Ace are always in my prayers.

Melinda Barton said...

Hey, it's definitely a long road. We're going through something similar with my niece, who's developmentally disabled to the say the least. She won't eat lunch with other children and covers her face in front of them. When she gets anxious, she stands in the middle of the room, balls up her fists by her sides and starts shaking. Or she runs away and hides. She's in therapy now and is starting to do much better. She even tried to eat lunch with the others recently. It's not abracadabra, but a few small steps are FREAKING AMAZING!

Ace is going to beat this like gangbusters. I mean, look how he's kicking CP's ass! (No, I don't mean he's cured, but the kid is rushing forward with the walking and the Friends' imitations.)

Alice said...

He's always been uber good around us and our kids, aside from the normal kid stuff (like getting tired and having a meltdown) but I know for GB it was also a struggle b/c she didn't understand why other kids did the things they do. (i.e. scream, hit, being too loud,throw, etc....)For a long time, she would sit away from the other children and watch from a distance....She would get frustrated b/c she didn't understand them. She related better to adults.

Any issue our children have socially, we take to heart b/c we want our children to be "normal"...

My husband is still extremely anxious around people.

You guys are in my thoughts....

mayberry said...

Hope you and Ace are over the crud soon. Mini-me and I are fighting that battle too. I'm thinking of moving to a more stable climate...

From the Doghouse said...

Hey, it's a major adjustment and it won't happen overnight. It does sound like he's in the perfect environment for facing his fears though, without getting thrown into the deep end.

Hope y'all shake this stuff soon (getting out Germ-X to clean off blog-borne germs).

Supermom said...

Hope you and Ace are feeling better with that sinus crud.

Bird said...

Well, I'm new to the party and therefore relatively unaware of the extent of Ace's anxiety. Like any good mama, you're helping him work on it.

rachel said...

things will get better. i promise. love you!