- A hygienist who likes to ask you questions that can't be answered with a "yes" or "no," THEN sticks her hands in your mouth.
- A hygienist who asks questions that are wayyyyy too personal. ("Why don't you have more children?")
- A hygienist who tells you that you should have more kids because "only children are brats!"
- A hygienist who pokes the EVER LOVING CRAP out of your gums and then says "hey, your gums are bleeding, you should floss more!" (Heifer, I floss 5-6 times PER WEEK. You're wielding that pick thing like you're drunk and sitting on a Hawaii Chair. Get out of my mouth!)
Things that make a visit to the dentist's office awesome:
- NO CAVITIES!!! Boom shakalaka boom!!!
- A student hygienist doing her senior year observations telling me all about how she has bad teeth too, and showing me all of the scratches she got from walking around in the woods at her "pawpaw 'n mawmaw's house," and telling me all about the snake bite she got at her "pawpaw 'n mawmaw's house."
- Dreeaammmyy dentist. I mean, wow. I'd be surprised if any of his clients were straight men. If Christy still did McDreamy Mondays on her blog, and decided to profile Jackson-area Dreamies, this guy could be on there like 3 weeks in a row and nobody would notice because they'd be all "mmahumminalalanumnum." Also, he's a highly competent professional.